And Ill encourage them to be proud. Im excited, are you? 15. The next morning, I woke up to an email in my inbox that was one line: "I'm really proud of you." Originally Published: March 28, 2018. momcilog/E+/Getty . We can all have slightly different interpretations of words which if not careful can start a war! So, lets get started! . Yes, I agree that it can also be very strong coming from siblings and spouses/lovers. Dont just thank them, you can reply with some cute responses to let them know that youre proud the same as they are. If a homeless guy on the street (lower status) or Bill Gates (don't know him personally) tell me they're proud of me it won't have a huge positive effect. "I know someone in recovery". Its also important to remember the power of positive reinforcement and the benefits of responding with gratitude. I am so lucky to have you in my life and your . The most important thing is to show your appreciation and gratitude for their words. It's nothing bad or unusual. Imperfect, striving, playful, loving, learning. First, he is probably higher status / higher power. Focus on what is positive in their life and avoid getting overly . Can't you do something different?" Responding to Im proud of you with gratitude has many benefits. He loves to share his unique perspectives and ways to make everyday conversations a bit 'lively'. That is why a long-term mentor can also feel pride. When you respond to someones words of admiration with gratitude, youre showing that you value and respect them. I dont think there is a neutral position. When someone says they are busy, it could mean that they are busy. Its my feeling that I should only express pride in something Ive accomplished. Kids also like to know that they invoke parental prideas long as it genuine! Im so glad that youre there for giving me support. My friends tell me that rather often so like once every month or so, which I think is a lot, if you say it more often you'll take it for granted for sure. 15. On the one hand, you're thinking, "He says I'm amazing," and you know he's not wrong. If you feel stuck on getting that pride going or can't seem to identify the traits or qualities you're most proud of in yourself, go back in time. What, do you really? "I know you have a lot going on . I do not believe that parents need to say "I'm proud of you" to show their support of, and their emotional connection to, their child. Best of BBC Future. A teacher or a mentor can be proud of their student, but you can't really be proud of your peers. Because we ran into a bunch of other classmates that were also there, we didnt spend time exclusively with each other but we did sit together at the game. I dont think that without your support I can make it. [Chorus] They say redemption's on your mind when you think about . If that's the case, I suggest a change of phrase. Well cover some of the better responses you can give, like thanking them, making them feel special, or making them laugh. Might you quietly ask yourself Who was it that put in the hard hours to get a good report? But, the real credit goes to you and you only! Overall, its reserved for people who you trust and respect. My boys are all each others fan club and its marvelous. Tell me something else, Ive heard this at home. A parent might say this to a child, perhaps. It makes a difference I think. Glad that I keep our family tradition alive. Proverbs 18:12 Before destruction the heart of man is haughty, but humility goes before honor. So thank you, mom and dad! posted by aimedwander at 4:27 PM on May 17, 2015 . Love you so much. But who are you to affirm? Wondering where that may be coming from. I am still so mad, but I havent said anything about it. Proverbs 29:23 A person's pride will humble him, but a humble spirit will gain honor. So - does this research negate my concerns regarding the phrase "I'm proud of you"? Someone who credibly says "I'm proud of you" usually has two characteristics. My boyfriends ex, posted a im so proud of you on a photo he posted: something he achieved. "Nothing is ever wrong. Praise such as this is a subject on its own much research and many, many books have been written on the negative aspects of praise. Who determines the meaning of words? What does it mean when a woman says she's proud of you? "I'm so proud of you" In this sentence, "proud" being translated to is absolutely right, and is also OK. But, it can also be a bit overwhelming because it puts the spotlight on us and can make us feel exposed. I am here for the same reason. I almost never tell anyone Im proud of them, for exactly this reason. And John is left feeling confused and despondent. You are of your father the devil, and your will is to do your father's desires. I have a little brother who is rather insecure and jealous of me, a very controlling person that thinks having a relationship with each other means that I put up with him trying to make me feel less than in the power scheme, which is precisely why I totally avoid him My YOUNGER brother about my creative talents has to say..I am extremely proud of you..for a bit, this has thrown me off, and I was not able to quite articulate how this really got under my skin, why I did a search on the phrase and have been thinking about itand yeah, it does seem a major insult when an emotionally uncool person whose relationship with you should be on equal terms has to act like a parent, always making a show of being the bigger man saying boy, I am so proud of you. Your friend wants to say "I am proud of you too, my friend". Make sure to take the time to think about how you want to respond. stories on the Parent Skills website are posted only as opinion or ideas, and are general in nature. The proud feeling transcends from child to parent. Congratulations to our dearest son. "Scorned ex-girlfriends are the worst. In these instances, simply saying "Wow" (and meaning it) will let them know you're proud. 14. 3. Updated 7th September 2016; and 19th April 2019. The phrase "Im proud of you" insinuates that the speaker (parent, teacher, co-worker, boss) has more experience, or power, or in some manner has the right to pronounce their opinion, on someone elses effort. Ive been waiting for a long time to give you this surprise! If you're an ex-smoker, you can draw from your own experience of quitting. Renew your PET skills; complete the full course over flexible times; or one-off parenting sessions. Thats why we feel pride in our childrens accomplishments. Thats the response I was expecting from you. You: "I have so much to do and not sure how I am going to get it all done.". 7. the person who says that is actually talking about themselves, not about me, and by saying that is drawing the recognition away from me towards themselves. She is an accredited and highly experienced P.E.T. That would have shown so much more appreciation for what I do 24 hours a day, instead of a measely Im proud of you.. The Proud Boys . I wasnt happy with this performance. If parents don't 'approve' of their child, then they disapprove. I really dont see that she had a direct influence in what I chose to do. Want to Change the Way you React to Your Children? They mean the exact opposite of what you think. He's proud of you. The rest were manual labourers. Your partner is really happy about the achievement that you have made in your life or career. Because this was someone elses idea. JavaScript is disabled. 16. Most of the time you spend together is in the bedroom. I wouldnt get anxious about it. 7. It means she feels proud for what you've done or achieved. Fascinating post in two regards. So happy for us! When someone tells you that they are proud of you, not only are they impressed by something you did and who you are, but they also want others to know it. Youre like my sister from another mother. Can "me too" be used here? You have always been there for me and our friendship is something that will never go away. How often do we utter this common parenting phrase, in moments of pleasure at our childs latest achievement? Its really a way of saying I am really the one who is special, Im the boss.and what it deserves is not thank you but rather, well kiss my ass you condescending bastard..get a lifethis proud of you nonsense is also related to people who have to say WELL GOOD FOR YOU when doing something mundane..like, someone catches me reading a book in publicoh, you are readingWELL, GOOD FOR YOU!! Do you really think this had a lot of positive impact on many children? Everything you do is with excellence. It's a way of congratulating someone for having accomplished something impressive. What does it mean when someone tells you that they are proud of you? Paul urged his young companion Timothy to be "a worker who does not need to be ashamed" (2 Timothy 2:15). Image used under license from Shutterstock, research suggesting that parents saying "I'm proud of you", protective role in a their child's mental health, Should Children And Parents Be Friends? you see the work of your close friend and you tell him "I am proud of you". A significant share of Americans (44%) say they personally know someone who has been shot, either accidentally or intentionally. Had I ever thought about the meaning behind these words? Looking for some extra money from your parents? Thats what I think. facilitator, with over 1000 parents completing the course with her. And they both say that you're over and done with me. 4. ie you have brought them up as parents and are proud of them for their achievements or manners etc. Its obviously a powerful word. As if Im mentally retarded and reading a book for the first time in my life, and hoping to get a cookie and a star sticker. For Stein, the worst compliment is hearing: "You've lost soooo much weight! Hosted by Pressable. ), belonging to my close friend, on her business page. You can accomplish anything that you put your mind to. I was excited to see your reaction. This is what makes the difference in whether the receiver feels great or resentful. I may never know but you can simply ask him if you question the genuineness in his response. 1. The effect of this praise might be opposite to the aim of the parent. Stay in the know when we release new content! With teens and adults, saying "I'm proud of you" is a bit different. 1. You reject that person's generosity. Try either "I'm happy for you!" or, what I find more accurate, "You bring me joy." "You bring me joy," communicates the sentiment nicely. Thank You. You might say: "I'm so proud of you for trying to quit smoking. A friend persevered in getting her masters degree after running into academic trouble as an undergrad. I just graduated with my degree in hospitality." "Oh, a future barista," says the other guest, swirling his drink. Second, he must know you well. "), Friend: "I'm proud of you for being brave and standing up to your boss", As the friend who has found that courage, is this statement something you would appreciate? This post was actually very helpful for me! It is our light, not our darkness that most frightens us. 3. Living with a parents disapproval, or continually seeking a parents approval, is a life-long burden. Praise does not help bring up children who have an internal belief in themselves, of self-worth. When someone says Im proud of you, they are expressing their admiration and respect for you and that can be a powerful thing. I felt great to know he as proud of me, especially after he had read my term report cards in high school. A: It's not necessarily wrong to take pride in our work, of course; if we don't, our work will probably end up sloppy or incomplete. I had an experience where a friend, who I consider in every way my equal, noticed that I made a healthy food choice (not that I didnt before, but I think its the first time he noticed) and he said, Oh Im so proud of you!. document.getElementById( "ak_js_1" ).setAttribute( "value", ( new Date() ).getTime() ); All Rights Reserved. Basically, its an ambiguous expression. It is arrogant. 3. Well, thats what we are going to share in this post. 5. Responding to Im proud of you with gratitude is also a great way to show appreciation to others. You haven't said who is speaking to whom. Who is saying this to whom? When someone insults you, the first thing you want to do is take a pause and a deep breath. I have a one year old boy and a two month old boy, and I had my first day back at work yesterday. 2. "Always work hard, be honest, and be proud of who you are.". There may be times when he gets some details wrong, but no one is taking score about who gets the fine points right most of the time. I can see a peer, a spouse, or even a child saying that to someone who got a new deserved promotion, for instance. Usually friends say "I'm so happy for you" or "Really nice job!" Family Tree. 4. Facebook: Please join us on our Facebook page for a mix of articles on children and parenting. 10. When somebody says that you are wrong: "You are entitled to your incorrect opinion." To each his own. Here are some tips on how to respond to Im proud of you: Following these tips will help to ensure that you are responding to Im proud of you in a meaningful way. I feel virtually murderous towards them. But some of us never heard the expression in our lives till we were adults. You could also feel patronised. 2014, 2016, 2019. #8: They say you need to change. Yeah, this means a lot to me. But, seeing youre proud of me, Im fine. You will even fall in love with me again seeing the next surprise! It felt great, and as he falls into both of the categories above, was fully appreciated. Larissa is passionate about the skills taught in Effectiveness Training. This will show your appreciation for their support and will help to strengthen your relationship. Thanks! Its a way of saying I see the hard work youve put in and I appreciate it. Youll feel mad and resentful. I have never regarded the word pride as implying that the one feeling it is somehow responsible for it. For what? . Is your partner proud because they can now be associated with a high achiever? When I tell my kids Im proud they are surprised and pleased. Why are you taking the credit for my effort? (I'd prefer "Congratulations! Look him in the eyes and smile. Encouraging children and others to be proud of themselves is healthier. Here are seven possible ways to interpret his compliment. A Macquarie Dictionary definition of proud is: feeling pleasure or satisfaction over something conceived as highly honourable or creditable to oneself. For me, this was a huge take-away moment. Proud Boys chairman Enrique Tarrio poses with a Proud Boys member at a rally in Delta Park in Portland, Oregon, on September 26, 2020. Whoever those people are, they are probably your mentors. Thank you, mom and dad, youre the reason for this. Her future mother-in-law (my friend) told me later she was proud of me. I know Im a couple of years behind, but was thinking about it this morning. 6. There are some super special and engaging responses you can give when someone very close to you, says that theyre proud of you. Instead of these phrases, focus on how proud you are of the person. Rather, relationship skills where we communicate respectfully by listening, by positive I-Messages, by problem solving with our child, will help ensure our children feel connected and valued, and provide our children with a sense of emotional safety. How many people in your life can say, "I'm proud of you," and you take it fully and without any sort of resentment or dismissal? Its just a colloquialism for way to go or awesome sauce or good for you! No one means to be condescending or imply they got you there in some way. I wish everyone had a genuine friend like you. And as it was your friends achievement, oughtnt she be the one who feels proud? 7. Responding to Im proud of you with gratitude can help to boost your confidence and can help you to overcome self-doubt. Lost Index. Here I would say something like, Youre so talented!/Thats brilliant! Thank you., Im honored that youre proud of me. Youre my friend, not my parents! William, however, was too proud and too obstinate to lend himself to such a course. He was a murderer from the beginning, and does not stand in the truth, because there is no truth in him. "If by a "Liberal" they mean someone who looks ahead and not behind, someone who welcomes new ideas without rigid reactions, someone who cares about the welfare of the people-their health, their housing, their schools, their jobs, their civil rights and their civil liberties-someone who believes we can break through the stalemate and suspicions that grip us in our policies abroad, if that is . To reply to that right, here are the better and funny responses to I am proud of you from your bestie. 2. I have always seen it as, Ive been there, done that, and think you have done it too.. Use thirty phrases to say "I'm proud of you" to make the special person feel good and empowered. Reading the Parent Effectiveness Training book, or attending a PET course, will help develop positive and respectful parent-child relationships, and explore alternatives to praise. I agree with you: its sad that he did what my parents should have done. A hug or a gentle touch of the hand can even get this message across. But I gratuitously accepted his compliment. The administrator suggests obtaining professional advice on any concerns (including medical or psychological) the reader may hold regarding their children, themselves, or others. Better Responses 2023. Narcissism can be a personality trait and a mental health disorder, and someone can have narcissistic tendencies without being labeled a "narcissist." When you live with narcissistic. When you say, "I'm proud of you," you may actually be simply rejoicing in another. 15. Even if the other person's words and/or actions seem reprehensible, try to be as . But to be proud of them? Required fields are marked *. The way you _____ is such a perfect addition for our family. John decides to replicate his painting (for the reward of praise, not for his own sense of improvement and competence), and looks up at his mother with rapturous expectation. 8. She said yes and then she said she wanted to go with me. Thanks for making us proud. Refresher workshop for P.E.T. I like what Chris Yeh said about the (phrase/declaration), Im proud of you, Congratulations on your graduation, dear son. But worse, my friend thanked them. 8. Don't remind them how far they've come. Saying, Im proud of you, is a great word and its an expression from the heart. . Likewise, these are special, cute, and funny replies when someone says I am proud of you and you dont know what to respond next. Positive reinforcement is a powerful tool that can help to encourage and motivate people. 0. Well, that means theyre impressed, happy, and overjoyed with what you did, achieved, or say something.
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